Fears

So my current savings is $1,29.13.

I just need $6,000 dollars more by the end of March...a breeze right?

I was so lavished with gifts this Christmas to fulfill so much of my needed gear for my trip. I got a waterproof Bible, an amazing sleeping pad, a goretex jacket, socks, sock liners, gloves, financial help, etc! I am so grateful.

I just need a few more things now...it's crazy to think that I am almost all set!

Lately I have been having a lot of fears about my hike. I think I am realizing how bold and assertive I must be...I am not good at this, but I am really excited to learn these lessons.

I couldn't sleep last night and I realized that I will probably have so many sleepless nights in which I will lie awake terrified at every sound I hear.

I do not want to live in fear and I will enjoy this experience for everything it has to offer everyday I get to enjoy it!

Another thing I realized I am worried about how I will get into town...I do not want to hitchhike alone but I wonder if this is going to be hard...

My friend asked me what I was thinking the AT would be for me...I guess for once I am imagining it will be a million things but also realizing it could be non of what I think. I don't know what it will be...but I think I am getting more afraid as it get's close...and more determined that it is the right thing!

I am very afraid of the damage it will cause to my already hatefulness toward sitting stuck in an office doing a job that I care absolutely nothing about...if walking outside during my lunch break is the one thing that keeps my sanity...how will 6 months of sanity effect my insanity indoors?!!?

I am concerned about money for my trip and after...and really frustrated lately about having to pay for more doctors visits for issues I am having and for the cost of medicine always making me frustrated...

But I am more determined to not give up...after all that I have sacrificed and put up with...there is no turning back...and I am excited and yet terrified!